Mummy Pirate

According to the West Toast-hopping Flippy, I currently look like a mummy pirate. A look that I will be rocking until Monday. The surgery went well, with the lesser of the evils being performed on my eye. I do have to keep it under an ice wrap (hence the mummy pirate look) till Monday. Fun. I’ve gotten very adept at waking up in the middle of the night when my ice has melted. I also have freezer burn on the left half of my face. Sexy, verrrrrry sexy.

For my first ever surgery, this was pretty good. I’m a great fan of the anesthesia, despite the fact that I had to have a tube down my throat. Not cool. They took it out before I woke up, but still, me no likey. I’m sure the bill for this is higher than the no-tube version.

I learned one important thing, post-surgery: When trying to re-insert your nose ring, leave the small cotton swab-like thing in the back of your nose alone, as this is attached to the teeny-tiny tubes currently inserted in your tear ducts. Failure to do so results in panicked phone calls to the doctor and the delightful feeling of having a huge wad of snot tucked away in the back of your nose, making you want to blow your nose constantly, but also making you afraid to even sneeze for fear of flying tubes.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to thaw my face.


~ by pithycomments on July 24, 2008.

8 Responses to “Mummy Pirate”

  1. Damn. So you’re like a tube-ish cyborg now. Except without the cybernetics. And more tubes. Yeah. Man I wish I was there to make fun of you. This is totally unfair of you.

    So the tubes are permanent? If we put a funnel in the corner of your eye could you drink beer by pouring it in your eye funnel?

    So many possibilities.

  2. Sexy is as sexy does. Freezer burn be damned.

  3. You are not turning me into a beer bong. or whatever they call it.

  4. picture please. although you did do a very good job at drawing an mental picture. want me to ship you some percocet? 🙂

  5. the picture is just so much better- trust me

  6. Post the picture instead of killing me slowly with these horrid details.

    tell karla I might puke.

  7. […] your name was. Still never figured out who exactly died), stressed about the near removal of the Cotton Swab of Doom, and ate very badly once the motherland returned to the land of […]

  8. […] it til you find it Back in July, I had a lil eye procedure that left me looking like a mummy pirate for a week. To recap, the procedure was putting a tube in my closed tear ducts to stop the constant […]

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